Question #12 “What Are Some Of The Best Things In Life?”

17 Dec

In at #7.

Funny you should ask that, Humberto from Honolulu, because I was just thinking about composing such a list. Here they are:

1. Trying to buy something that costs $4.92 cents, and having exactly $4.92 cents in your pocket.

2. Getting to the train/subway platform just as the lights of the  approaching train/subway are coming into view.

3. Avocados.

4. Buying a ticket to a movie that you’d never even heard of, and finding out that it actually doesn’t suck.

5. A good cup of coffee and a satisfying bowel movement, and then later that day telling someone about it, and saying, “that’s all I fucking ask for at this point in my life, there is no God,” with a cigarette dangling from the corner of your mouth.

6. Hating someone for a long time, thinking you were the only one who hated that person, and then coming to find out that everyone else hates them too.

7.  Dying without ever seeing it coming.

8. Waking up on your day off, and for a few minutes thinking that you have to go to work, before realizing that it’s your day off, and the children are away somewhere.

9. Opening up a piece of mail, and it’s a check made out to you for some ridiculous thing that somehow happened at some point a long time ago, but fuck it, you’ll take it.

10. Not having cancer yet.

Disagree with my list? Have better entries?  Email me at, and I promise I will promptly ignore your recommendations. These are, objectively speaking, the top 10.

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